Smells Like Tween Spirit // A Frolic Through Days Gone By

For a friend; I told you that you'd have "cringe". 

 Mrs. Twiggs' famed 3B ELP US History class // Charlie's Angels

I'm worse at what I do best
And for this gift I feel blessed
Our little group has always been
And always will until the end

This past Thursday I decided I ought to look for my old poetry, stories, and other forms-of-expression-more-or-less-immortalized-on-paper and read them. It had been a long time since I had looked at that stuff, and I was intrigued as to the nature of "Tweenage Scout"'s records. I have yet to uncover most of the trove, but I DID find my old journal, which I began writing in on my 12th birthday and completed at some point during my freshman year, and it is prime. I mean, I kind of want to time travel and slap 12/13/14-year-old Scout in the face, but then I wouldn't have such a fabulous time reading my old journals...

"I am no Dickinson and no Wordsworth. I am not Dickens or Twain. I am certainly no Shakespeare. But I am an Asay, and I am like no other." Hahahaha

Clearly I thought I was Sherlock, though; I'm also fairly certain that my eternal bond with Lerin began in CTE.

There are angsty rants about society and the media in conjunction with swine flu, lengthy accounts of summer written in prose, and SONG LYRICS. I know that Tweenage Scout probably thought that she was very deep, and I am glad she believed that, if not simply for the comedic value. I was reading through the verses in my 1st period on Friday with friends and we were laughing so hard we were not crying, no, but sobbing. Tweenage Scout, thank you for believing that you had any musical inclinations, and thank you for trying to prove it. Also, thanks for creating words, ie, disreponand = despondent. 12-year-old Scout used this monster to describe my iPod Touch; I think it's safe to say that I did not grasp the meaning of the word.

I also seem to have been very indecisive:

"I do not want a pet. I want a dog."
"I despise love my mom."
"I HATE writing am too lazy to write in my journal."
"I hate mildly despise writing in my journal."

The transition into "teen angst" is BEAUTIFUL:

"This is the first of my hopeless dreams."
"I am busy. I am tired. I can't wait for summer. Or my senior year. Or no more school. Or to be a grandparent. Or my death. UGH."
"I obsess about stupid things...I lock myself in my room. Blah life sucks."
"There is an abyss in my heart, emptier than a barren wasteland." 

There are also full pages that have been crossed out, with the words, "He lied!", scrawled across them. To clarify, this was not in reference to a boy I liked... Though that would have been the cherry on top.

Sometimes I'm just dull:

"Writing to a friend in Germany. School is semi-cool. Skiing is cool. Got a new red jacket. Too cute. Room is done.""I draw.""I sang and drew."

But I really, really like seeing my relationships with others reflected on the pages:

"Coach Lee is an angel from above. Amazing."
"Isaac Nelson is one of the funniest people to walk the Earth."
"Kassner is so funny and his shoes are amazing! But math is just so-so."
"Well, Emma is in the UK for three weeks, and I miss her, but I shall never tell her because she's Emma." Word to your mother. 

Keiko and me at our first Spirit Bowl. Those glasses. Dang.

Sometimes I really just want to hug Tweenage Scout:

"My passions: daydreaming. Also, I think I can get a falabella." Falabella = a breed of horse; I was planning to keep it in the backyard, because the city and my father would never take issue with that. 
"Kissing is horrifically revolting. The worst part of Pride & Prejudice is when they kiss; why did they have to kiss?!?" Her confusion, though. *Five stars*
"I love people, but I guess I like observing them more, which would explain why I like sitting my myself on Saturday nights watching movies; please don't talk to me." But really, please don't talk to me.
"Gave my Harry Potter Pt. 2 premier ticket to a friend so they could go. I really want to go. I'll go when I get back, though. I can wait." You did something... Nice. I'm... Really proud.

My conclusion: please keep writing, Teenage Scout, or Young Adult Scout will have nothing to look forward to.

I'm just...so happy; life is so very splendid,
Scout

San Fran Spring Break 2011: people are cool.

Oh, Good Lorde!

Lorde is my favorite musician currently, and why shouldn't she be? Aside from her poetic lyrics and her unique and haunting sound, behind her stunning face and mermaid hair and fabulously unique fashion choices, she is a phenomenal role model. Why? Here are just a few from the multitude of reasons...

Oh my gosh astoundingly exquisite perfection, all captured in a photograph

1. Lorde is Lorde, and she doesn't pretend to be anything else. She has said, "I only wish goodwill on people, I just speak my mind a lot." She's not a hateful person, but she won't lie or avoid answering a question, and I love that. So many people - especially in the media - pose in figures that don't reflect who they are - not Lorde. Everything is carefully calculated to express her and her ideas; her music videos are perfect examples of this. In an interview with Billboard, Lorde told them this:

“In a perfect world, I would never do any interviews, and probably there would be one photo out there of me, and that would be it.” She continued, “I feel like mystery is more interesting. People respond to something that intrigues them instead of something that gives them all the information — particularly in pop, which is like the genre for knowing way too much about everyone and everything.”

Magnificent.

2. She stands by what she says. This doesn't mean that she doesn't take the time to clarify and clear things up when necessary, but it means she avoids wasting words. I'm all for that. She is honest and takes responsibility for what she says; how many people - let alone teenagers - do that? 

3. She is confident: she embraces what success she has had and acknowledges that she is blessed and the like, but she doesn't act bashful when her fame and success comes up. I like that, because she isn't overly humble, and, going back to point one, she isn't putting up some facade, like, "Oh! You mean my success? Ha, oh, stop it you!" No. She knows that she has talent and doesn't pretend that she isn't special. It's a balancing act, and she's found the equilibrium. 

5. She thinks. Her lyrics are clever and expressive, reflecting, well, her: her interests, opinions, observations, desires, etc. She doesn't just putter around like a sheep; she has own opinions that she's formed and that she also expresses. 

4. She is an observant teenager; she recognizes and articulates so many of the good, bad, and neutral characteristics of adolescence that most kids can't express:

The belief that we are more distinguished than we actually are, 

We wouldn't be seen dead here in the day, // I guess you're lucky that it's dark now // And if I like it then we'll stay // Impress the empress, take a shot now

"White Teeth Teens"

The idea that we are separate from the triviality around us:

But everybody's like Cristal, Maybach, diamonds on your timepiece, // Jet planes, islands, tigers on a gold leash // We don't care, we aren't caught up in your love affair. 

And we'll never be royals, // It don't run in our blood, // That kind of luxe just ain't for us, // We crave a different kind of buzz. // Let me be your ruler, // You can call me Queen Bee // And baby, I'll rule, I'll rule, I'll rule, I'll rule; // Let me live that fantasy. 

"Royals"

The truth that while forced isolation sucks, we really just want to be alone:

I'm sitting pretty on the throne, // There's nothing more I want - except to be alone. 

"The Love Club"

The knowledge that it's all an act:

I'm faking glory, // Lick my lips, toss my hair, // And send a smile over // And the story's brand new // But I can take it from here; // I'll find my own bravado 

"Bravado" 

The comprehension that much of the time, we're spending our hours doing nothing much: 

We're never done with killing time, // Can I kill it with you? 'til my veins run red and blue; // We come around here all the time, // Got a lot to not do, let me kill it with you. 

"400 Lux"

And of course, she's remarkably self-aware - as all teenagers are from time to time, some more often than others:

I feel grown up with you in your car; I know it's dumb. // We both got a million bad habits to kick, not sleeping is one. 

"A World Alone"

She is absolutely brilliant. 

5. She has her own desires, goals, and aspirations. She isn't infected by other people's expectations for her or their dreams and desires - that's sensational. 

6. Along with that, she isn't too invested in what others say about her. Period. She doesn't read her own reviews and she doesn't get caught up in celebrity and social media drama... She just does her thing, and she enjoys it. She takes the bad with the good and drives on through it all, and to that I say, "Bless you, Lorde, you saint."

Signing off as your pseudo cultural guru,
Scout

In More Recent News...

My dad went to Costco yesterday and brought back a twin pack of Nutella - evidence of the mayhem incited by our mother's absence (she's chilling in Costa Rica), and a monumental day in Asay family history. I must exercise my discipline moooorrre. Well, right after I finish eating a third of this container, while simultaneously sobbing because the orthodontist is trying to kill me. 

Sherlock said, "It's a two pack problem." I'm paraphrasing. 

I got my first ticket! I am not excited about this... Did you think I was? The cause was my lack of "stop" at a stop sign when I was turning right - no vi ningún signo de parada; ¿usted?

BuzzFeed is ruining my life, ie, will to work. WHY MUST YOU BE SO ENTERTAINING AND CLEVER, BUZZFEED? WHHHHYYYYY??? 

To all of you who were wondering if "yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassssss" was still a thing: it will always be a thing. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTJoH-xBCxQ (For those of you who are not pop culture gurus and require some catching up.)

I lost my iPod car connector - which begs the question, HOW? - and my disc lineup in meager: Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge* soundtrack (Bollywood), The Music Man (what, you don't want to listen to "Goodnight, My Someone" at 7am? Yeah, neither do I), some singer-songwriter chick (I have absolutely no idea who she is or where the disc came from), Billy Collins reading a selection of his poetry, Paul Simon, and Cat Stevens. I have a sneaking suspicion that Weezer is hiding under the passenger seat. 

A section of the section of IB Film that I'm friends with (definitely did that just to trip you up) selected me to act in their horror film for Halloween, along with some other friends, like PETER! Quite the experience, let me tell you! It involved several trips to a horrid abandoned house (in Bountiful, no less) filled with trash and junk, and fake blood, of course, and a ton of sass and paranormal activity. The people involved were fun; "Can't Jack just beat me?" If the editing is ever completed, I'll post the finished product here, because it's most likely very entertaining, no matter the reasons... Film people are weird. 

 Tyrone and I had to act kitschy; you can't blame us for this selfie. 

Also, his name is not Tyrone, though it does start with a "T".

Oh yeah, and then there's this beauty:

http://entertainment.time.com/2013/10/27/snl-made-fun-of-all-your-favorite-wes-anderson-movies-last-night/

Between this and the trailer for The Grand Budapest Hotel (!!!!!!!), I could easily do no homework for at least two weeks. 

Well, but then this happened: 

Rezo que mis padres todavía no lean mi blog.

I had it coming,
Scout

* http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7NVIwO8_pI